Finality

of it all. I am here in Las Vegas having attended a funeral of a co-worker that I worked with many years ago during my early years. He passed away from a heart attack and left a wife and adult children. Many nice things were said about him and every one of them true. The collage made by his family showed his life and loves. His true age did not show being only 71 years young. As I watched him being lowered into the cement ground vault brought me back to my own father's burial almost nine years ago in the same place of interment, the Veteran's Cemetery located in Boulder City. It was eerie and sad. My own sadness and loss of a parent is hard. It is still nine years later and I foster that void in a part of my heart, a missing link. The final closing of the cement lid and the empty sound that it makes in the breeze of the wind. The harshness of this dessert region combined with the living and the dead is a reality check of how fragile my life is. How life is given and how life is taken, in the blink of an eye, the sighing of a last breath and the light that leads you from now to forever. Surely, If I were to be taken now, I would have so much unfinished business that I don't want to leave my family members without resolving much of it. I would so miss life, the breaths, the joy and my friends and family. What will they think when I can't say goodbye? If I love them with all of my heart and show them, then there is no need to say goodbye

Hawaiian family gatherings

are never ending in my family and I've haven't been to one yet that has ever ended before midnight. My cousin Moke had a belated birthday party for two of his daughter's Anastasia and Vanessa (12 & 9) across the bay which my daughter and I looked forward to attending. As with celebrations there were also funerals that we attended for this family. My uncle and my cousin April, who recently passed away from Cancer and left two teenage boys, her husband and two twin girls (6 months old). April was the event planner of the families. She would send out the evites, plan the menu, co-ordinated the jumper, rent the facility or be the first one to secure the best area at a public park. That was April in a nutshell. With all of her love and aloha, she welcomed everyone into her family, no matter what race, color or creed, you were treated as family.
Hawaiian parties never start on time and this was no exception with a 2:00pm start and dinner finally being served a few hours later. The greeting of family and friends are always given in hugs and kisses. Introductions to familiar faces and the memories that we reminisce from past events and families that all brings us closer never losing those ties. Dinner is always excellent and plentiful. Smiles, laughter of children and conversation are the center pieces of my life. Our opu ( stomach) full of food and drink, we enjoy the rest of the night in music. My Aunty Joyce seems happier than usual and is more talkative than combative and she warns me about Mark and keeping him away from my daughter. My Aunt is a fiery red-headed haole (caucasian) woman who in her younger years was a total hottie. Wise in years, she can see everything in it's development and she does not like Mark. As the night starts to fade away and the crowd thins out, we start the task of saying goodbye to all of our family members which usually takes an extra twenty minutes. My cousin reminds me of another party in two weeks for her sister's twin girls and in agreement, I know that I need to be there. Our jaunt across the bay is short as my daughter and I converse about Mark, a long time grade school friend of my cousin Moke and now a single father who has frequented these parties since his teens, who has now taken a liking to my daughter and from what she said, wants to ask me if he could see my daughter. Sounds so old country Filipino, doesn't it? I told my daughter, who doesn't have an interest in him, he's going to have to go through the proper channels, my Aunty Joyce.

Time together

I'm very glad that Lynn brought an extra jacket, scarf and gloves for me while we enjoyed lunch on a concrete table under the winter sun at Coyote Point Park in San Mateo. She had neatly packed some turkey, cranberry relish, sweet gravy, bread and salad for our entree in travel sized Tupperware. Dessert consisted of the last of her chess pie and homemade pumpkin pie. After our Delicious lunch, we made our way to the Coyote Point Museum. With a little under two hours left for us to visit, it was more than enough time to see the exhibits. With the sun going down and the winter night getting chillier, we made our way over to Burlingame's Starbucks. There is nothing like a Venti Caramel Macchioto to ward off the last of a December chill. Lynn and I talked of our week and where we will be. She has a gig this weekend singing in a funeral that a friend was not able to do in San Francisco and it starts early in the morning on Saturday. I'm hoping that she could spend the night at my house, since I'll be chauffeuring her there, to lessen her commute and to spend some much needed time together after our week of misunderstandings and the need to communicate to one another. We were both in agreement of that idea. With our warm libations all but gone, we sat in her car and conversed more and to also complete our gift exchange since she had forgotten it during our last weekend together because that was her busy concert week. I received a much needed set of sea green bath towels from Lynn, along with some candles and perfume. I was still missing my ring that I had left with her last week that she had given to me during our second year together. This was the first time that I had been without it and was missing it very much since we had reconciled. She said that is was being repaired. I trusted her with it and I trust that I will be receiving it back soon. Darkness had fallen and it was time to go. With a kiss on the lips, a meaningful hug and a long embrace, we are on the road to recovery.